Empty Nesters

September Journaling

1.     Just a quiet day at home, bbq-ing burgers and cleaning a bit.

2.     Another good writing day, my last before I head back to work tomorrow. Also went out for coffee after dinner, with my husband. Am I a bad mom if I say I’m enjoying the first day of our empty nest?

3.     Back to work tonight. I’m nervous about it only because my pain has been getting worse and the pain killers are slowing me down. Straight from work in the morning I go to see a specialist. A Rheumatologist; they specialize in problems with bones and joints and muscles, like arthritis and lupus. I’m hoping to get a step closer to a diagnosis for what’s been causing me pain for the past year and getting some relief. The Robax aren’t holding the pain off for longer than two hours now.

4.     So after driving through rush hour traffic (I don’t know how people do that every day) to the wrong place at first, then waiting another hour to see the Rheumatologist, she told me she doesn’t think I have Polymyalgia Rheumatica, but a Chronic Pain Syndrome brought on by the Mononucleosis I had last summer. She said if that’s the case there’s no cure. She ordered more tests to rule out other things, and told me to wean off the Robax and gave me Naprosyn and Baclofen, a Non-steroidal anti-inflammatory and a stronger muscle relaxant. Relief would be nice, I hope it works. But it was discouraging to hear there would probably be no ultimate relief from it. I’m only 50. Do I have to look forward to a few decades of pain? I can see how this could lead to depression. At this point I was hopeful that it could get better. Even if it had been the PMR instead, that is usually self-limiting and goes away spontaneously after about two years, which would have been okay since I’m already into the second year, but alas, it’s not. But at least I know it’s not in my head, and that I don’t have to worry that each new ache or pain is some new dread disease. A girl can get paranoid.

5.   A good night last night. Hopefully, I’ll have a good sleep today.

6.    The medication has made me light headed, but I don’t mind, because I can move much more freely with these new medications. 

7.    My mom is coming home from Finland tonight after 10 weeks away.

8.    Back to work for four nights, but I don’t even mind because my pain is 85% improved. Thank God! I don’t feel light headed anymore either. For the first time in a year I am not thinking about my pain every minute. I am leaping around the house, jumping for joy! Here is a picture of me, jumping for joy, from a few years back, but that’s how I feel now.

9.  Wow! What a change! I have energy and mental alertness. I feel like I can do my job. When my husband came home and asked how my pain was, I said, “What pain?” I haven’t answered him that way in almost two years.

10.  A very busy night, with only two of us instead of three, but I got all my work done and didn’t have that feeling that I missed something. That’s a nice feeling.

11. Slept poorly again.

12. Slept all day, then cleaned out a closet.

13.  We went to the maternity home I volunteer in, and my husband put together a change table for one of the new moms. I was glad he was able to come and see what Wings is all about, and meet Marion and get a tour. I think he’ll be helping there as well as much as he can.

14. Being pain free has given me so much energy. Cleaning and rearranging cupboards and furniture. Also had a doctor’s appointment to rearrange meds. She was shocked to hear my pain was controlled.

15.  I had my first meeting with the counsellor and even though I didn’t think I’d cry, just bringing up the pain over leaving Faith did it. I also didn’t realize how many losses I’ve been dealing with these past two years. Yikes! Anyway, this was just an assessment day, and they’ll assign someone else to be my counsellor. This one knew my daughter and said, “She’s awesome! I know we’re not supposed to have favourites, but…”

16. Work. Thankful when my mom offers to cook for us. I can sleep longer or just wake up slowly.

17. My husband is taking a course at Toronto Baptist Seminary on Early Church History. He’s loving it. He’s only auditing it so he doesn’t have to hand in assignments but he’s trying to do them anyway, just to challenge himself. Dr. Haykin is a great teacher.

18.  I volunteered at Wings today. They didn’t need anyone for childcare so I helped with lunch. I made a homemade tomato soup, and they also had chicken pot pie, Caesar salad, broccoli and pumpkin pie. Delish! I didn’t realize how fast time would fly and navigating in someone else’s kitchen slowed me down. I was thankful she eased me into it this way, where I wasn’t responsible for the whole meal. I’d like to do that again. What a challenge, but so much fun.

19.  Weekends fly so fast, but I have more energy. I almost forgot what it was like. Also we had friends over from out of town. They were just over for about six hours, for dinner. My husband made jerked chicken, and we had a Jamaican meal. The best part was that they were so supportive about our church situation. They go to our former Pastor’s son’s church and he has been very understanding as well.

20. So this is what summer is supposed to feel like! It says something about how bad our summer has been when the first heat alert occurs in September.

21. I can’t get over how much easier work seems since I am not in pain every minute.

22.  Oh. My. Goodness. What a busy night! Fifteen patients for two nurses. But it’s over and I’m off for four nights.

23.  I got a message from the daughter of a former founding member of our old church. She read the book I compiled, Testimonies of Faith, and encouraged me. She said I did a great job. Nice to hear. Someone else who read it said it’s a great legacy to leave at Faith even if we’re not there anymore.

24. I went to the walk and talk with some women from church. It’s nice to get to know some of the women.

25.  My appointment was changed again as the counsellor had a family emergency. Now I’ll be going in two weeks.

26. My youngest daughter came home for a day to attend the funeral of her Pastor here in Toronto. Not a nice reason to come, but it was nice to see her. I also had a good day reading through my manuscript to see which final few scenes I need to write and what I still need to research. I also went through each scene to see that I knew what the goal and conflict was, and looking for plot holes that needed to be filled.

27.  My new church had the first women’s meeting/breakfast of the fall season. We also brought baby clothes for a local pregnancy care centre. (I also bought something for my grandbaby). I also bought paint for a desk, but I won’t start painting till Monday.

28. A great day at our new church today. Pastor Randy started a series in the evening, going through 1 Samuel, which is great for me, since that impacts my novel writing set in the same time period. I’m trying not to think that today is the 50^th anniversary service at Faith. It breaks my heart to think about it. I think as time goes on, the pain seems to get worse. We also got two calls yesterday from people there, asking if we’d come back and saying they miss us. When people don’t know what happened, they imagine things, and don’t understand why we couldn’t come back. What would we be coming back to? What would we be celebrating? No, our days there are over, but I’m still upset about how it happened and the stories that are still circulating. We’d like to move on.

29.  I started painting my desk, table and shelves. It’s kind of brighter green than I expected, and shiny, but it’ll be a statement piece, if nothing else. I can’t tell you how much of a big deal it is for me to even consider a project like painting. I haven’t had the strength, energy or motivation to work on a project for two years.

30.  I also went to Value Village and got two wall shelves and a low square desk for $11 which I will paint the same colour as the desk and put them in my writing room. Good deal, eh?

Grandbaby Number One on the Way!

August Journaling

1.     I couldn’t share the news until today. I’m going to be a Grandma! Well, a Mummi, to be exact. Our eldest daughter is pregnant and due in early February. I’m sooooo excited! She actually told us way back at our other daughter’s graduation dinner. She gave my husband a gift for Father’s Day. It was a small box and inside was a soother. On the inside of the box it said, “Can’t wait to meet you, Grandpa! Love Baby M”. I caught on a little faster than he did, but it was still a shock, since they told us they didn’t plan to have kids for five years. Surprise! I cried happy tears. I am so happy for them. J

2.    We announced it on facebook and twitter and I posted some pictures, including the 12 week ultrasound and a pro-life pin of the size of the feet of a baby 10 weeks in utero. Church this morning, burgers and corn on the cob for lunch.

3.    Holiday today; Simcoe Day. It’s a civic holiday for the man who founded York (Toronto). We’re making jerked chicken and grilled veggies. We had to cook it in the oven because of a storm. Four people were struck by lightning today.

4.    Today we are attending an event at Queen’s Park with the Lieutenant Governor celebrating Emancipation Day. The event is put on by The Ontario Black History Society. We were invited because our daughter works there and they invited the parents of the summer students. They had to do a check on us before they sent the invitation. Then we’re staying downtown for dinner and I’m going to work.

5.    A quiet night. Stressed because tomorrow night they transfer our few patients elsewhere and may close our unit. I dread going to other floors.

6.    Oh. My. Goodness! We were sent to a Haematology unit. This is why I don’t work in haematology anymore. I had a patient who had sepsis and a knicked hepatic artery and ended up in ICU. Crazy busy does not describe it. So exhausted and my back was killing me. Then when I woke up we went out for Japanese food.

7.    Cleaned all day then went to a friend’s place for bbq. There was another couple there from our old church. It was good to see them and we kept away from the painful topic of church.

8.    Another great bbq today and a chance to learn about the new church we’re attending.

9.   I’m working four nights this week before vacation again. I am sure I’ve slowed down somewhat. I seem to take longer to do the same tasks I’ve done for years and I don’t feel I communicate in the same way.

10.  I had a very sick patient last night. He is dying and doesn’t want to die in hospital. He pulled his I.V. out and begged me not to put one back in. Sad. Of course, we followed his wishes.

11. I’m exhausted and I missed my train because we had an inservice so I got to bed later than usual.

12.  It’s only another two weeks before our youngest heads off to law school and we’ll officially be empty nesters. I have mixed feelings about it as I’ll miss her company but I’m excited about this time in our lives.

13. Last night. Gotta get through.

14.  We had an appointment with the bank to confirm her loan for law school. I also packed for the Carey conference and baked two blueberry pies.

15.  First day of Carey. I was worried about it and my husband said we wouldn’t go if I wasn’t comfortable which I appreciated him saying, but I thought it would be awkward seeing our former Pastor. He broke the ice though and said hello. We haven’t seen them in two months. We also had friends over for pie.

16. Our former Pastor preached this morning. He is a fine preacher and that was never the issue. The evening preacher is Jeremy Walker from England and he is very good.

17.  Excellent message this morning by Ken Davis. This is a no-fuss Carey. I didn’t even plan my menu since it’s just the two of us, and we have more than enough and to share with friends.

18.  We went into Paris, Ontario for lunch at a restaurant with a rooftop patio overlooking the Grand River, which isn’t much more than a creek, at least at this junction. We’re at the halfway point of the conference already, six out of twelve sermons delivered already. My husband met with our former Pastor today in the hopes of achieving some sort of reconciliation, but not much happened that gave him hope.

19.  We are having the speaker and his family over for dinner today. Since I know the people who are serving them lunch are giving him roast beef, we’re just doing a chicken Caesar salad with garlic bread and a key lime pie.

20.I hesitated to come because of all that has happened in the past two months, but I’m glad we came to this conference, because the support we’ve received has been so uplifting. They say our character and behaviour over the past thirty years speaks for itself and they understand the character of the other party as well. We were encouraged once again to take the high road as the truth will eventually come out. We will just rest and heal.

21.Back home, unpacking and doing loads and loads of laundry.

22. Outfitting and packing our daughter up to leave the nest on Wednesday. Then we’re going to a 30^th anniversary for a couple who my husband was in their wedding party and he was our best man.

23. Even though it’s Sunday, we’re going to the beach with our daughter and her husband. I don’t feel terribly bad about it since we just heard twelve sermons in six days and we’re going to be getting more involved in church in the fall.

24. Dentist this morning, then packing my daughter’s things.

25.  Our youngest is 22 today.

26.   We moved our daughter today. My husband was anxious with the moving van since last time there was a little incident that cost us big bucks, so he didn’t relax until it was delivered safe and sound. I can neither confirm nor deny whether there were any tears when we emptied our nest. There was a vandalized stop sign that said, Don’t STOP believin’. It was encouraging. The church our daughter plans to check out is a few blocks away. You can see the lake from her place as well.

27.  I woke up from a bad dream and now I can’t get back to sleep. That hasn’t happened in a long time.

28.  I am still grieving leaving Faith. I know there’s no going back, but I’m still upset about how it happened and the timing of it. I am angry at Brian and yet I still love him. I fear getting bitter. I worry about settling into a new church and if it will ever feel as comfortable as Faith was for us.

29.  I wrote another long, important scene today. One step closer to finishing. Then I had a date. Still on vacation till Wednesday.

30.   Going to IKEA because our daughter’s desk was too big so we had to bring it back home. Then we’ll bring it to her on Sunday after church. Then when we say goodbye, it’ll probably be until Thanksgiving. We’re going to a TFC game this evening; it was a gift for my 50^th from my sister and husband. Then we’ll check out the EX. The game was horrible, our team lost 3-0.

31.  Good message at church today. I’m starting to get to know the people. Then we drove to Kingston to bring the new desk to our daughter. My husband assembled it while my daughter and I walked around downtown. Then we went to a rooftop patio for lunch.

 

World Cup Soccer

August 2014 Journaling

1.   Happy Canada Day! I am working four nights this week so we aren’t doing anything. Also we had our dinner party on Saturday and then a bbq at my mother-in-law’s on Sunday.

2.  Crazy busy at work. I definitely earned my time and a half last night.

3.    A box of books arrived at the door, but I have no time on work days to even look at them. Argh! Maybe on the weekend.

4.   So excited to watch the World Cup semi-final of Germany vs. France. Go Germany! Also ordering Japanese food for dinner and then watching a Hall & Oates concert on t.v. with my usual date. Oh, and Happy 4^th of July to all my American friends and relatives.

5.   The master plan is to spend this whole day writing, working on finishing my novel. We’ll see how that works.

6.   Yesterday I managed to write a scene that had stymied me for quite a long time. It was about hand to hand combat and since I don’t know anything about that I kept putting it off. I have just a few scenes left to write but that was the hardest part. At church this morning, some new friends we met at the Carey Conference last year were presenting their upcoming missions work in Zambia. Then they came over for a bbq. I also made homemade ice cream sandwiches in chocolate chip cookies.

7.   Working three nights. It shouldn’t be bad, except we are short staffed and so it will be a challenge.

8.  Yay! Germany defeated Brazil quite soundly 7-1 in the World Cup semi-final.

9.  Argentina defeated the Dutch so they will be playing against my team in the final on Sunday. Also, my fourth guest column was published in Barnabas magazine. See below. This one was more devotional than the other three.

10. Crazy night at work last night, very busy and short-staffed. I felt overwhelmed with the stress and I made a sloppy mistake in the last few minutes of my shift, but at least it was caught and no harm done. Now on vacation for 18 days. I love summer vacation!

11. Went out for dinner this evening. Otherwise I did laundry and grocery shopping. I also saw my family doctor. I got bloodwork done and I have two specialists to see and a mammogram requisition.

12.   My husband and I went on a little trip to Camp X in Oshawa. It was a spy training camp in WWII. It inspired the founder of the OSS, precursor to the CIA, and also Ian Fleming, who created James Bond.

13. Church this morning, and the World Cup final this afternoon. Whoo Hoo! Germany, my team won the World Cup! I am very happy.

14.   On Vacation for two weeks, or rather, stay-cation. We have a few day trips planned. Tonight I walked with the ladies from our new? church. They have a walk and talk for an hour each Monday and Thursday evening. There are three speeds of walkers and you pick a speed and go. There were a dozen of us this time. Then we watched a documentary on Camp X. Very interesting. It would have been nice to see it before we went there.

15.   We went to the ROM to see the Forbidden City exhibit. Also had lunch downtown.

16. I had a stress test done this morning. It’s on a treadmill. The reason is I’ve had chest pain once or twice, at work. Is it stress? I’m able to walk without pain so I doubt this will show anything, but it’s all we can do for now. Then I baked two blueberry pies and we’re bringing one when we visit our daughter and son-in-law this evening for dinner. They are house-sitting. They told us to bring our bathing suits as there’s a pool, but it’s a rainy afternoon, so we’ll probably pass.

17.  Pay day; always a good day. Planning for a beach day tomorrow with friends from our old church. The weather is meh, but it will be nice to see them again.

18.  Beach day today. Nice weather, very relaxing. Nice to see friends from our old church.

19.  We’re going to Stratford today to see King Lear. I don’t know anything about the story, and I sometimes prefer that. It was good, but I didn’t know it was a tragedy; a bit of a bummer.

20.   Church today in the two places we’ve been going to since we left Faith. The Pastors there are very supportive, although we’re not always in the mood to talk about it. It hurts too much and we’d like to move on. He encouraged us to take the high road when we are being slandered. The tendency is to want to retaliate to clear our name. So hard.

21.  Goal to finish my last few scenes this week so I can finish my first draft. Our eldest is on a four day mission trip to Fort Hope again this year. I got a call today from my doctor’s office saying I needed to see a cardiologist asap and to go to the ER if I have chest or left arm pain. I guess the chest pain I had a month ago was really cardiac pain. Then the cardiologist called to book the appointment for Thursday, and then my doctor left a message saying my stress test showed I had exercise induced significant ST depression, which are changes on my ecg. Of course I looked it up and it says it is diagnostic of clogged coronary arteries. Quite stressed out.

22.  Trying another beach day today. There’s nothing more relaxing than sitting by the water. We even went swimming.

23. Seemed more like a sick day than a vacation day. I woke up with chest pain, went to emerg and had an urgent angiogram. Then developed my first migraine headache post procedure. Good news is the chest pain isn't due to blocked arteries. Now for more tests to find out what caused the ecg changes with the stress test. Thankful for free healthcare, good news and a husband who was by my side all day. The procedure itself was rather unpleasant. I could feel the wire in my heart and it kinda freaked me out. Then they clamped me down to the stretcher with a vise. It made me cry. One of the worst parts for sure. Then following the procedure I had such severe pain in my head. Not sure if it was my first migraine but my right temple was throbbing for hours. It was unlike the facial nerve pain. This was unbearable. Thankfully, I had two tablets of a stronger painkiller left over from my surgery, so it eventually took care of it. As soon as I learn my heart is okay, my head is not. Arrgh! Is there no end to my health issues?

24. I saw the cardiologist today. At least he had the results of my test from yesterday. So he said, “I can’t say what it is, but I can say what it isn’t.” So basically, when I have this ache in my heart, I can be assured that since I’ve had the gold standard test of an angiogram already, and they know there is no blockage at all, I don’t have to worry that I am having a heart attack. He also said the changes on the stress test are consistent with women at my age and since it didn’t result in chest pain at the time, it’s not anything to worry about. Then he asked if I have had any recent stress. I said, yes, about the time that the first pain happened. It appears that leaving our church has caused a literal heartache. My heart has broken.

25.  Although our 28^th anniversary is tomorrow, we’re going out to eat at  the Keg tonight. I have a gift card from my birthday to offset the cost. This morning I’ve been researching some narratives in the Bible for my last few scenes. I wrote a scene with Absalom showing his vanity. Then when we went out to dinner, we had to leave early because I had my third migraine in three days.

26.   Doctor’s appointment today to update her on the cardiac issues, then I told her about the migraines. She ordered a treatment rather than a prevention. We’ll see. Shopping and mani-pedis with my youngest. She’ll be gone in a month to law school and we’ll be empty nesters. Then I held off one migraine, but another hit later. It takes 7 hours out of my day, while I lie down and put ice on my head and hope it will pass. The medicine isn’t working very well.

27.   Church this morning, and a migraine hit as soon as we got there. Forty five minutes of visual aura, then headache. After a few hours of rest till it passed, we played croquet. When my daughter heard we bought it and played it, she said, “What are they, retired?” I said, “Ha, ha, we laughed so hard our dentures almost fell out.” Five migraines in five days. What will I do when it’s time to go back to work tomorrow night? I started keeping a migraine log so that my doctor can see how they’ve come on suddenly and are severe, and medication of any sort isn’t helping. My husband’s family came to visit. It was thoughtful, but when I’m not having a migraine, I’m totally fine, and if I’m having one, I’m out of commission.

28.  Working four nights. Vacation, such as it was is over. Feeling very nervous about possible migraine. After five for five, I’m watching for the signs of the sixth. In the meantime, I’ll prep for work.

29.  So on the day of my fifth migraine, I reduced my hormone replacement therapy in half, and I didn’t get a migraine on the sixth day, but I get hot flashes. If I have to choose, hand me my fan. Today I made oven fried chicken legs, chick pea salad with lime vinaigrette, cauliflower, and tomatoes with feta and oregano. It’s all I have to work with. Tomorrow’s dinner is still a mystery.

30.  Busy nights, but no migraines. Today I took ½ a Gravol to help me sleep since I only slept two hours yesterday. I ended up sleeping eight hours and waking up ten minutes before I usually leave home. My husband didn’t come home at the usual time because of a retirement party for a co-worker. I usually have a few hours to prepare, and this time I had 30 minutes and then had to drive downtown. Thankfully the traffic was good, and I arrived at exactly the same time as I usually do, but it threw me off a bit, and I didn’t have any food with me.

31.   We went out for dinner at a local restaurant called Symposium. It was pretty good. Tomorrow we are going to IKEA and bbqing steak and seafood. Long weekend for Simcoe Day.

Daughter's University Graduation

June Journalling

1.     Many tears at church today as our Pastor announced his retirement. Even though I knew it was coming, it was hard now that it’s official, but I’m happy for him and his family as they begin this new chapter at the end of August.

2.     I got my orthotics this morning. I need to break them in slowly. It’s going to take some time to straighten myself out.

3.     Busy night last night. Also orientating a new nurse, which I like to do, but it takes longer to stop and explain why you’re doing what you do at each step.

4.     Last night. Urology night. I hate urology night, have I mentioned that before? Enjoying the orthotics. I feel like I’m walking straighter.

5.     Exercising my civic duty/privilege and voting in the Provincial election. Our youngest daughter will be working on election day at one of the polling centres nearby. She also interviewed for a job today with the Black History month society. It’s only for six weeks, but it would help her out with her schooling costs. Also went to a musical my niece is in this evening. She has a great singing voice and can act as well.

6.     So many appointments today; physio, the weight doctor, a massage, then off to shop for a grad dress and shoes for my daughter for Tuesday.

7.     We went to the Niagara area to the wedding of a couple in our church. It was outdoors in a chapel in the woods, and then indoors for the reception. It was casual but very well suited to this adventurous couple. Perfect weather, though I got a sunburn. Our daughter went to Kingston today with her new housemates and they signed a lease on a beautiful semi-detached colonial side split. Very clean and nice, and reasonably priced and a few blocks from the lake and a short walk from the university.

8.     Church was awkward today. There’s been some fallout about our Pastor’s retirement as many are thinking of it as a resignation and are unwilling to accept it. Ah, church life. There’s no life like it! I feel bad because we haven’t had strife in the church for at least ten years and I remember now that I don’t like it. My poor husband, as he has stress at work and stress at church. At least he feels his home and marriage are a haven. Can you imagine if all three were pressing in on him?

9.     Physio this morning. It seems to be helping. I went without taking any muscle relaxants since last night. When the physiotherapist was putting his weight onto my back I felt like I would break. My daughter told me to be tough. “Pain is just weakness leaving the body.” It was good for a laugh. Also printing out documents for the upcoming writer’s conference this week, and beginning to pack.

10.  My youngest is graduating from university. I can’t believe how quickly the years have gone by. So proud of her. She is graduating with an Honours B.A. with distinction, in Peace, Conflict and Justice Studies from University of Toronto. Then we’re going out for dinner at Port in Pickering. Update. My youngest also heard about her summer job. She will be working at the Ontario Black History Society for six weeks starting in July. Yay!

11.  Annual meeting tonight. I hope it goes well, or at least not as bad as it could. Worst case scenario we would have to leave the church. I’ve been there 30 years, and he’s been there 37 years.

12.  The meeting did go as poorly as we feared. I’m afraid of how this will end. I hope it doesn’t split the church. In other news, I’m off to Guelph for the Write! Canada conference for writers who are Christian. I’ll be gone Thursday thru Saturday. I hope my back can handle all the sitting.

13. At Conference. I had professional photos taken and attended great classes and had great feedback at appointments with agents and editors. I met so many nice people and learned so much.

14.  Home and back to see World Cup Soccer. I am cheering for Germany, who happen to be favoured to win this year. We recorded a few games while I was away. After 37 years at Faith, and 28 of those in leadership, my husband handed in his resignation tonight. I’ve been there 30 years. My heart is breaking. I will especially miss my Women of Faith group.

15.  Father’s Day. We attended a nearby church where we know some people and the preaching is good. It still seems so surreal not to go to Faith. My husband feels such a release from the stress. He needed to look out for his health and well-being. I’m not there, yet. It seemed to happen so suddenly.

16.  Still ruminating all the events of the week through my mind. I guess I am grieving and included in that is anger and resentment, sadness and confusion. I think this was totally unnecessary and I wish it didn’t happen. I am trying to let go and look forward to what the Lord has for us in a new place, but it’s so hard to not think of myself as a member of Faith. I pray for the people there, I love them, and I know others will take our place.

17. Work is a little less crazy this week, thankfully. Sometimes I have hot flashes that steam up my glasses. Isn’t that ridiculous?

18.  My mom will be going to Finland for the whole summer. It will be so different without her around.

19. Pay day. Always a good day.

20. I had massage this morning at physio. Quite nice. Our daughter and her husband came to spend the night and we ordered in. They wanted to see my mom before she goes away.

21.  A beautiful summer day. Longest day of the year. My husband re-stained the deck. The icy winter did a number on it.

22.  We went to Newcastle Baptist Church this morning. I like the feel of it. We felt welcome. I felt funny when the Pastor welcomed us from the pulpit, mentioning we were from Faith. He doesn’t know otherwise, and we don’t really want to talk about it. This place would be nice if we retired and lived closer but for winter or for service and having people over, it’s not feasible.

23. Three nights this week.

24. Friends over to talk it out.

25.  I’m sad that people are filling in the holes of their understanding of the ituation and totally getting it wrong. We didn’t leave because of the resignation issue, but that seems to be the story going around. As much as we want to clear my husband’s name, we won’t tell people the details. We just want to let go and move on, now.

26. I ordered some books with the gift cards I got for my birthday. Some of them were books on writing that were recommended at the conference.

27.  In spite of the food at the conference, which I couldn’t control, I lost more weight. Total of 10 pounds in 7 weeks. The main thing is I’ve lost 12 inches overall. And my blood pressure is improved.

28.   We had our dinner party tonight. Our theme was Canadian Summer fresh and the menu was cherry sangria, caprese bites, mushroom and garlic bruschetta, spring pea soup, walnut pear and bleu cheese salad with maple vinaigrette, grilled quail, bison bites, and Atlantic salmon with smashed roasted potatoes and bacon wrapped asparagus, and strawberry shortcake trifle for dessert. Yeah, it was delicious, and the weather was awesome.

29.   We went back to a nearby church again. We already know quite a few people from there and the women were happy to hear we may attend there. It was encouraging. My mom headed off to Finland tonight.

30.  My nieces are going to live in Paris, France for a month. Pretty awesome experience for them.