So. Many. Pills

October Journaling

1.   This was my day yesterday: up at 7 a.m., Bible study, breakfast, one load of laundry, load dishwasher, rest for an hour before lunch. Make lunch and eat it on the couch with feet up. Tried to read but vision blurry, rest for an hour, clean bathroom, (first time in two weeks), rest two hours. Help prep dinner, eat, then on couch for the rest of the evening, until midnight. Yeah, that’s about all I can manage on a good day. Today I have to shower AND take the GO train downtown for a medical appointment. Not likely going to manage all that and make dinner, too. Also, this is my fibro-fog. I went to pick up my daughter’s orthotics, paid for them, and left without them.

2.    Prepping for lunch tomorrow, when we have a guest over, then heading out to babysit our grandson overnight. I hope I can do it.

3.    We have a church history Professsor at our church today, Dr. Michael Haykin, who is speaking on four notable women in church history. We’re hosting him for lunch. Then heading out to Burlington to babysit.

4.    I slept poorly, but I was glad we went to church with our daughter’s family. Pastor Robbie Symons preached on homosexuality, which is a watershed issue today. He handled the issue with grace and yet very true to Scripture. Then our Pastor was continuing his series in 1 Samuel, which I love.

5.    I’m loving our Women’s Bible studies through the Pentateuch. We’re using Kay Arthur’s inductive Bible study method.

6.    I purchased a CES machine from the pain clinic. It is a cranio-electro-stimulator. You can set it for energy, pain relief, or sleep. You wear head phones, ear clips and goggles. Lights flash, it pulses on your ear, and you hear the sound of a pulse and buzzing. It feels strange but it works well. I usually do it when I have to rest anyway, like after climbing the stairs before my shower, or in mid-afternoon when my vision is too blurry to read and I need a nap, or in the evening before bed.

7.   My average accomplishment is to shower, run an errand, like go to the post office or drug store, and make some sort of dinner.

8.   Shopping for food for Thanksgiving dinner.

9.   I had an appointment with the Environmental Medicine Naturopathic Doctor. He’s starting me on many supplements and I have to go through my house and change so many things. How to find energy. My sister-in-law was kind and came over to help to cook the turkey, peel potatoes and set the table.

10.  We’re having our Thanksgiving dinner today. Only twelve this time, so we can all sit at the table instead of doing buffet.

11.  A good day at church. Our Pastor preached on fasting on Thanksgiving weekend. The irony wasn’t lost on him.

12. A relaxing Thanksgiving day at home. Also our daughter's third anniversary

13.  We had a Cope with Hope meeting tonight. It went well and I presented on Fibromyalgia and Pain, while another woman did a devotional on the purpose of suffering in our lives.

14.  My mom and I went to babysit my grandson today to help her out.

15.  Haircut and eyebrows done. Feel less grungy.

16. I had a treatment at the Naturopath today. I was a little nervous about it, but it seemed to help.

17. Going to visit friends and see a family we’re going to support on the mission field. I also baked some squares for church. Had to rest up in order to manage the evening. Evenings are my worst time.

18.Heading into a week of appointments every day. Tired just thinking about it.

119. Election day here in Canada. It didn’t turn out the way I’d hoped, but I’ll try to pray for our new Prime Minister so he doesn’t mess up the country too much.

20.Today I had to go downtown to another appointment at Women’s College Hospital for the three month follow-up at the Environmental Health Clinic. It was an ordeal as usual, since I had to walk so far from the parking lot to the train and  back and I got turned around and walked for a few extra blocks because of my being directionally challenged. All for just an update on what’s working for me and what’s not.

21. Another appointment, then trying to do a little cleaning today, and by a little I mean vacuuming upstairs.

22. Eye doctor appointment today. Need new glasses. My vision is rapidly deteriorating because of Fibromyalgia, especially my night vision. Then this evening we met with our realtor from our last two purchases. We discussed our options and may sell next year. This huge house is just too much space for the two of us, and I can’t even clean it anymore.

23. Another appointment this morning. I’ve got a year to purge and pack. I tried to clean out part of my walk-in closet. I dragged things out and sorted through them while seated. Even that was too much exertion. But I threw out a garbage bag full of stuff and sent two bins of paper to recycling. Purging feels good.

24.  So funny. As soon as we’re ready to let go of our home, our daughter calls to say they’re thinking of moving in with us after all, to save money for a house. Of course, it was a surprise, but we like the idea. It’d be great to see our grandson every day, but there’s no way I could look after him. If I was well enough I’d be back at work. My balance is so bad, especially on stairs. I don’t feel safe to carry him. So I guess we’ll be here another year or two longer than we planned.

25.My treatments from the Naturopath are helping, and I’m losing weight. I’m eating only organic food now, no preservatives or processed food, and I’m finding what foods cause reactions. Potatoes cause me pain, which is sad because I love them. Finns eat potatoes every day. A small family garden is even called a perunamaa or potato field because it’s a given that they’ll grow their own potatoes.

26.My appointment wiped me out. And of course, as I was leaving there, I was walking across the flat parking lot and suddenly twisted my ankle and nearly fell over. It takes a special kind of skill to be able to do that.

27.Women’s Bible study then grocery shopping. Had to rest two hours before I could put the food away and make supper.

28.Chiropractor appointment today.

29.  Another appointment. Busy few weeks. I set up my pills for the week. I’ll post a picture. I take 87 pills a day, most are supplements. I don’t know why I feel I have to prove how sick I am, but there it is. Got a form from the insurance company today, already asking for more medical forms to prove my illness, as if anything has changed in the past few months. I’m already booked for appointments every day for the next few weeks, now I have to find the time and energy to go there again. GRRR.

30. My mom is coming over for the weekend to bake her famous Finnish gingersnaps, and to help clean out a closet. My husband is on his annual fishing trip to Manitoulin and our daughter’s home from Law school for a week.

31. It’s Reformation Day! 488 years ago today, Martin Luther, then a Roman Catholic monk wrote 95 talking points to address some of the errors of Rome, that sparked the Protestant Reformation. After darkness, light!